Author Archives: Paw Prints in the Butter

A pious young lady of Trinity Was taking a degree in divinity. But she went on the town With a fellow named Brown And unfortunately lost her lecture notes.

So (you have to start a sentence with ‘so’, it’s the law) we’ve finally put our paws in the twittersphere. It’s great fun, not having a clue what you’re doing, but I rather think it’s a case of lighting the … Continue reading →

There’s some noise, and a sly, noxious smell. Someone’s let off a trump, can’t you tell? The voting has ended And what’s done can’t be mended So it’s ‘Goodbye, and see you in hell.’

A couple from St Pierre La Mer Embarked on a torrid affair. The pair, well-endowed, Attracted a crowd When doing the deed en plein air.

In France what you mustn’t be doing Is mixing your words when you’re wooing. Un baiser is a kiss – Every schoolchild knows this – But if you baise you’re not kissing, you’re screwing

To inform, educate, entertain: The BBC’s role was made plain. But there’s been a take-over By programmes on make-over In fashion, décor and terrain.

A frisky young fellow from Lille His girl friend’s tétons tried to feel. She told him: ‘Michel Snogging’s all very well But if you go any further I’ll squeal.’

A burly young fellow named Thierry Went to a fancy dress ball as a fairy. His date said: ‘Mon chou, That look isn’t you – In fact, it’s decidedly scary.’

The BBC’s losing its wits And the viewers are all having fits Since it opted to take off The programme called Bake-Off And consign poor Top Gear to the pits.

We all stood in line for a flu jab And the nurse said: ‘We’re trialling a new jab. It may work, it may not – We don’t know what we’ve got – But we’re hoping to hell it’s the true … Continue reading →